Gospel: Matthew
18:15-20
(Jesus said to his
disciples) “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between
you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have won over your brother. If he
does not listen, take one or two others along with you, so that every fact may
be established on the testimony of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to
listen to them, tell the Church. If he refuses to listen even to the Church,
then treat him as you would a Gentile or a tax collector. Amen, I say to you,
whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on
earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again, amen, I say to you, if two of you agree
on earth about anything for which they are to pray, it shall be granted to them
by my heavenly Father. For where two or three are gathered together in my name,
there am I in the midst of them.”
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Reflection:
A young mother would
always shout at her daughter whenever she commits mistake. This was her behavior
until her child grew up, eventually the child learned to answer back. Thus,
whenever the mother would shout at her, she would shout at her also to
reciprocate the insult. When the daughter grew up she became aloof and distant
toward her mother.
What is the
importance of having a one on one talk with someone who offended you or someone
who is at fault? You signify your sincerity to sincerely correct the person who
is at fault. And you send a message that you want to immediately contain and
solve the problem without offending anyone. By doing so you create a sincere
message that you want to build bridges and not walls.
Many of us commit
the mistake of correcting a person in-front of a crowd but this will not help
heal a wayward behavior. This would only create a deeper emotional injury to
the person who is at fault. So, instead of bringing him/her closer to healing
and reconciliation we instead are creating a wedge that may permanently injure
the person.
This teaching of
Jesus on how to privately correct a person is very useful for all of us. For
the reason that there are times that we let ourselves be taken over by our
arrogance rather than our kindness and gentleness. What is the use of power if
it will only divide and create further emotional injury? What is the use of
correcting a person in full view of the public if it will only create a deep
seated feeling of hatred?
The way of Jesus in
solving conflict is always the way of diplomacy, fraternal correction and
gentleness. Never through arrogance to propel one’s power and influence. –
Marino J. Dasmarinas