Reflection for August 11, Wednesday Memorial of Saint Clare, Virgin: Matthew 18:15-20

Gospel: Matthew 18:15-20

(Jesus said to his disciples) “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have won over your brother. If he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, so that every fact may be established on the testimony of two or three witnesses. 

If he refuses to listen to them, tell the Church. If he refuses to listen even to the Church, then treat him as you would a Gentile or a tax collector. Amen, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.  

Again, amen, I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything for which they are to pray, it shall be granted to them by my heavenly Father. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.”

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Reflection:

The story is told about a mother who would always shout at her daughter whenever she commits mistake. This was her behavior until her child grew up, eventually the child learned to answer back. Thus, whenever the mother would shout at her, she would shout at her also to reciprocate the insult. When the daughter matured she became aloof and distant toward her mother.  

What is the importance of having a one on one talk with someone who offended you or someone who is at fault? You signify your sincerity to correct the person who is at fault. And you send a message that you want to immediately contain and solve the problem without grandstanding  and without offending anyone. By doing so you create a sincere message that you want to build bridges and not walls.  

Many of us commit the mistake of correcting a person in front of a crowd but this will not help heal a wayward behavior. This would only create a deeper emotional injury to the person who is at fault. Hence, instead of bringing him/her closer to correction, healing and reconciliation we instead are creating an emotional wound that may permanently injure the person.  

This teaching of Jesus on how to privately correct a person is very useful for all of us. For the reason that there are times that we let ourselves be taken over by our arrogance rather than our kindness and gentleness. What is the use of power if it will only divide and create deeper emotional injury? What is the use of correcting a person in full view of the public if it would only create deep-seated feeling of hatred that might result to something untoward?  

The way of Jesus in solving conflict is always the way of diplomacy, fraternal correction and gentleness. Never through arrogance and power tripping to propel one’s authority and influence. 

How do you exercise your power and authority? – Marino J. Dasmarinas